Hyperboled wind blew rigorous to cleave mighty elm tree!
Truly, snapping like toothpick! Debris smother our yard and neighbour yard. Regard such damage!
Alas, casual chimney rip by roots! Such miserable sound tearing twisted metal crashing...
We must come to rescue... we trek to roof?
we bored! august days with too much dog.
gno traktor. gno power tools. gno coffee. gno humans. gno capitals. we much bored.
We seeking excitements - mayhap RedSox fans recognizing us world famous gnomes?
Regard us awaiting on steps for ticketing....
112 years we have now!
Truly gnome years pass different from human years.
Yes, still we adolescenting!
Me, I still prefer 111. Much gnicer number.
When we permitted to operate vehicles and heavy machinery?
Hmm, gnot sure enough gnome years ever for that...
Many happy birthdays to us! We live long and prospering!
You there, small boney one!
You daren't descend -- fearing unDead reefercussions!
Truly I ferocious you up up up and away from lurking and haunting gnuisancing!
HaHA...I guardianing gnobly as unDead.... you stay high and ... awayish...
Now I hang with celebrity вампир - Truly, I and товарищ Edward ... we become chummy ... hang out ... chew fat... drink pints... (though truly, we regard Bella some bit boring.)
Mayhap Cullen adoption to family... hoping they gnot regard me competitous (for alpha vampyre...) some вампир a bit gnasty... and scary!
Owwww! Full moon call me! I rise to occasion, open cloak, take wing, like летучая мышь...
Vladimir, full dramatics call you! What you up to now with towel?
True Vampyre needing respectful cloak! I borrow...Mayhap I quoth "Nevermores"...
Nevermore qothed by Raven, not Bat!
Agh, save me from loathfull self -- such sorry tragedy to become UNdead...
Vladimir, I tell you, we gnot UNdead, you gnot Vampyre!
...how happened this ghoulishm? Mayhap ancestrals from Transylvanian descent... very adjacent to Russia...
Vladimir, you desist such insaniting! And remove sillyness of tomato hoop...
It is cage...for I be dangerous! I roam earth under cover of gnight, search for... oh too terrible to consider...
Ach, serousness - if you truly Vampyre, so why you out making such moans under cover of bright sunshine?
Mayhap we be Vampyres? Truly not reflecting
Hmm, dubiously we NOT-dead, which similarly not as UN-dead....
Truly, NOT un-dead, which be double negativity...which mean...
Opposite....Wait....! We... dead?
Ah, for certain we see some hazy imaging... please?
Mfffxxxxbbbbff! Soon we be frozen fossils, bury for epochs under glacier layers....
Mmff! Mfmbmbff! Geologists discovery our bones with mastodon skeletons and peaty materials!
Ohhh, we doomed, we doomed! Where Global Warming when so gneedy!
Mfffmfmfmf! To rescue! Melt us! Set FREE us from frozen tomb of silentness and white!
Mmmffff... this MUCH undignified!
We cannot see out!
Or speak out!
We buried!
Mffbbbffxxx...
We gnot cold! We hardy Russian gnomes... where bones bite from true fridgidness. But truly, it blows fierce wind today....
Scarfs just for decorative... fashion announcement.
Mm, mayhap you mean fashion statement...
Yes, statement of us to be not cold.
Mayhap we find fashion statement hat too?
Merry Boxing Day! After busy gnight for help Saint Nicolas with some few erranding, we exhaust of chimneys!
But gnot of presents! Regard such gnice stockings, full and puffy...
Yesterday we wrap, cook, deliver, clean...finally we scrub from sooty stacks to open herewith stockings! Christmas not happen without we helpers.
Today, we boxing.
Yes we much deserving of OFF DAY.... so hard working are we....
Regard us our gnew heights! Truly hats grow taller than we.
And, we survey blizzard postmath, beautious wonderland, like olden days.
Much shovel and scraping ahead, we mayhap start handing out shovels.... we such helping hands, truly we "keepers".
And mayhap we stay up for midnight New Years?
Ah, freezing snow makes truly glamming Santa hat with me, think you?
Hmmm, ye-es, but once melting, it likely flop over again... but mine...
Regarding puffy eleganting of symmetry, truly I musing right now my hat quite more bigger of our two...
Well, right now...is tricky, as sun moves to us I thinking you lose superior hatting.
How to be Christmas Gnome when my hat refuse to cooperate! Much encouragement needed for it to stand tall.
Yes, truly my hat raise tall and pointy!
Fmmmf! I try but my hat habit to fall over to side. Arrggh!
Yes, MY hat much the stronger!
Hmmm, some few leafs cloggiing gutters...much twigs and dirt...
Very slopey steep up here, I feeling gravity slidings...
And what be these smallish clumps?
Ahem....seemingly raccoons using roof for...
Ewwwww...!
We best wait for help....
выйти! Shoo! уйти! Haunting time long gone! Away you brittle bundle of bones! Poof! You disappear now!
We all seriousness! You, скелет in tree! We come and get you! Gno hiding from us...we gnot kidding!
You femurs not toooo scary big!
Hmm, I afraid of height! Mayhap I am stuck!
We dissed on FaceBook for "back-seat yardworking"!
Regard you our diligence, slavering away in such pouring rain...
Up on slippery ladder - we so small and mere - to reach treetops for snippings and shrubbings...
Robes leaking cats and dogs... soaking in eyes and noses...
We so Gnonappreciated...
we make marveling effort on branches and shrubbings! Many piles of debris!
Yes, look you busy as we pose for photo of efforts and accomplishings!
15 barrels of branches and weeding! We make marathon yard cleanup!
Mayhap we now ask for ice scream and popcorn?
Aggh, we entangled with stringed Jacking Lantern and scary skulls! They not ridding of us, we tied up!
Already time for next holiday lightings and decoratings but we ensnared with binding lights!
Hostages to Halloween!
Mayhap we do some entertainment for great sucking up for Hallowing permissions to Trick & Treat?
Yes, a song... a dance? I read poetry?
No, much better -- a Magical Show! Ah, I know amazing trick... Greta, lie down.. just here...
Aaaahh! This the life! We Suburban Gnomes now!
We Guests of Honour and Appreciating! Toasty and dry indoors with TV and many delightful popcorns and ice screaming!
Truly we become celebrities of Lexington ...declining to return home where we are not provided popcorns or TVs...
Hmm, mayhap I gneed such hat as intrepid archaeologist Jones...
Sparkly lining to cloud of Mission Delay... we remain earthbound to offer birthday whishes to Reignome who collect gnine years this 13 day of Gninth month -- hmm, mayhap 13th day would have been unlucky for travel anyway...
We sending joyous greetings and calcium to strengthify growing skeletal structures of true FOG (friend of gnomes).
Gnock Gnock...
С днем рождения!!!!
Delay of Moon Mission Accomplished!
Such sorrows not to launching voyage of giant step for Gnomekind but truly, star astrognaut gneeding much recovery from trauma of dastardly disc drama.
Many thank yous to fans for all petitioning GNASA... Mission Control waiting patiently for my speeding recovery.
Many fans sign petition to delay moon mission for me.
I file papers with GNASA for them to know such popularity signifies public opinions and strength of support for Vladimir the Valiant to be First Gnome on Moon.
Truly they gnote my significances.
A thousand curses dastardly discs disrupt my destiny.
Moon mission approaches and still I disable myself!
What to do! What to do!
Truly it is destiny for me to be first Gnome on Moon... there cannot be understudy for such great footprint!
Please sign petition to Powers Who Be for delay of launch until necking problem subdues.
ach, I still tipping Greta. Great pains in neck and shoulder... see my arm scrunches up to cramping and shoulder goes all hunchy!? I walk much like Quasimodo... though, true, he memorably famous...
Yes, Vladimir, of course you hunchy.... dastardly G6-G7 disc herniation makes painful dramas with nerve roots, we learn this takes much recovering.
